ON REPRIMANDING CHILDREN a lot of people tell their kids to stop doing something, and that is ineffectual. why is this? it is because the children only work by imitation, and when being told not to do something, it does not process, rather, they only learn to imitate how their parents are telling them off. if a child is banging pots and pans, and someone yells at them "stop banging", they don't stop banging, they just learn to yell at other people like they were yelled at. the better thing to do in this case would be to pick up some crayons, and start drawing--in other words, DEMONSTRATE the desired behaviour, and the child will imitate. knowledge of this one simple principle can make a tremendous difference in the ability of the parent to bring the desired behaviours out of the children. the following are some exerpts from a lecture by the educator *rudolf steiner*, who helped establish the most popular independent schooling system in the world for the children of the waldorf-astoria cigarette factory in the early half of this century. CHILDREN ARE IMITATIVE BEINGS Human beings are the most imitative of all animals. This is especially true of the child before the change of teeth. Everything is imitated during this time, and as whatever enters the child through its senses as light and sound works formatively on the organs, it is of utmost importance that what surrounds the child should act beneficially. At this age nothing is achieved by admonition; commands and prohibitions have no effect whatever. But of greatest significance is the EXMAPLE. What the child sees, what happens around him, he feels must be imitated. For instance: the parents of a well-behaved child were astonished to discover that he had taken money from a cashbox; greatly distrubed, they thought the child had inclinations to steal. Queostioning brought to light that the child had simply imitated what he had seen his parents do everyday. It is important that the examples the child sees and imitates are of a kind that awaken inner forces. Exhortations have no effect, but the way a person behaves in the child's presence matters greatly. It is far more important to refrain from doing what the child is not permitted to do than to fobid the child to imitate it. (Rudolf Steiner, Lecture VI, Cologne, December 1, 1906, "Education...", p.96) AMUSEMENT After a few days, Willie got tired of it [the Waterwheel] - and small blame to him, for it was of no earthly use beyond amusement, and that which can only amuse can never amuse long. I think the reason children get tired of their toys so soon is just that it is against human nature to be really interested in what is of no use. If you say that a beautiful thing is always interesting, I answer, that a beautiful thing is of the highest use. Is not a diamond that flashes all its colours into the heart of a poet as useful as the diamond with which the glazier divides the sheets of glass into panes for our windows? (George MacDonald, from 'The Gutta Percha Willie') ON TOYS FOR CHILDREN The developing organs must be treated in ways that promote their health and inner forces. The child should not be given toys that are too finished and perfect, such as building blocks or perfect dolls. A doll made out of an old table napkin on which eyes, nose and mouth are indicated is far better. Every child will see such a homemade doll as a lady attired in beautiful finery. Why? Because it stirs the imagination, and that induces movement in the inner organs and produces in the child a feeling of well-being. Notice in what a lively and interested manner such a child plays, throwing itself body and soul into what the imagination conjures up, while the child with the perfect doll just sits, unexcited and unamued. It has no possibility to add anything through imagination, so its inner organs are condemned to remain inactive. (pp. 97-98) [Instead of stimulating the child with synthetic noises reproduced electronically, it is better...] at the ages between one and seven all kinds of songs were sung to the children, like...nursery rhymes and children's songs. What mattered was not sense and meaning but sound; the children were made aware of harmony and consonance; we often find words inserted purely for the sake of their sound. Often the rhymes were meaningless. For example: "Fly beetle fly, your father is away; your mother is in Pommerland, Pommerland, fly beetle fly." ... it was not the meaning in such rhymes that was important, but the sound; hence, the many children's songs had no particular sense. (p.99-100) Nothing has a more deadening effect on the child's spirit than putting together and fixing some structure, using finished geometrical shapes. That is why buildng blocks should not be used; the child should create everything from the beginning and learn to bring to life what he forms out of the lifeless. Our materialistic age extinguishes life through mass-produced lifeless objects. Much dies in the young developing brain when the child has to do meaningless things like, for example, braiding. Talents are stiffled and much that is unhealthy in our modern society can be traced back to the nursery. (p.102) As every age makes different demands, it is useless to lay down general rules. it is not knowledge or proficiency in pedagogical methods that matter in a teacher, but character and a certain presence that makes itself felt even before the teacher has spoken. The educator must have attained a degree of inner development, and must have become not merely learned, but inwardly transformed. The day will come when a teacher will be tested, not for knowledge or ever for peagogical principles, but for what he or she is as a human being. (p. 109) Modern teach methods fail...because only the external aspects are described... Plants should not merely be shown and described, the child should make paintings of them..." (p. 109) It is best not to give children perfect dolls and similar toys. A healthy child will only get pleasure from it for a short while. A knot in a table napkin with indications of eyes and ears will provide far more pleasure; this is because the child's fantasy becomes active in providing what the doll lacks. (p.135) (Rudolf Steiner, Lecture VI, Cologne, December 1, 1906, "Education...") -- SUBMIT AN ARTICLE posted: august 24, 1999 last updated: april 19, 2004